Armed with his identification card, Jeff Waters walked into the Jacksonville Bank of America, strolled up to the bank teller, and attempted to cash a check for $368 billion dollars.
But when the teller told Waters that the check that he bought from a homeless man named Tito was unusable he became distraught.
The Inquisitr reported that when the tellers became suspicious, Waters explained that a homeless man by the name of Tito Watts had sold him the blank U.S. Bank of Idaho check (which was issued in the ’90s) for 100 bucks a few months ago.
Tito, the “upstanding” guy that he is, told Waters that he can go ahead and cash the check for whatever amount he wanted.
“Tito said the check was good for any amount I wanted to write it for. So blame Tito, not me. I’m as innocent as a schoolgirl,” said the Florida native.
So, Waters made the check out to “Cash” and headed to the bank to cash the check.
Waters said that he wanted the $368 billion to start an Italian restaurant. But his dreams didn’t go far.
“It’s always been my dream to own the best Italian restaurant in the earth,” he later told the police.
According to Moron.com, Waters had planned to make the restaurant 80 million sq. feet and able to accommodated (sic) 30 million eaters at once, plus it was gonna be totally underwater so people could look at sharks while they ate.
“But the bank wouldn’t give me my money they owed me.” Waters said, “Tito said the check was good for any amount I wanted to write it for. So blame Tito, not me. I’m as innocent as a schoolgirl.”
I’m sure you can guess the outcome. In addition to a forgery count, Waters was charged with unlawfully carrying Chinese throwing stars and possessing bath salts. He was released after posting $23,000 bail.